Magical mystery tour of gaurdians of the fridge

I think someone's been guarding my fridge or something. I mean, seriously, I just can't seem to get into it as of late. I mean, I open the fridge but then I don't see what I think I wanted to see or something like that and I shut the door. Then, I just walk away.

When I felt the urge to snack, I'd open the fridge. Not see anything I liked. Then checked the freezer. If I still didn't find anything I liked, I then checked the cupboards. If it turned up zilch back to the fridge and the frightening cycle begins.

Yet, it's almost as if I have some magical mystery guardians or something around the house or something. I'm just not getting past certain points. I just don't get it.

I can almost imagine some gigantic viking named Sven or something standing in my way like the angel did for Balaam. Or Gandalf standing in the way saying "You shall not pass!" Don't know what it is, but it's like I'm just not getting there or something.

And then, when I go to the store, it's like there's some gaurdian there as well, blocking me from buying these sweets or really really really good types of food. And if I do throw something in my cart, it's like woosh and it's out again. I can just imagine some mean looking guy with a sword and sash or something just walking around smacking the bad food from my cart and hand (He wasn't around yesterday when I bought the apple fritters. He and Sven went out for coffee or something I think, but hey, even magical mystery guardians need a coffee break here and there, I'm tough work for them, poor guys). I don't know if I have a name or not for the guy in the supermarket that's been stalking me lately but he doesn't look all too pretty.

Yeah, that's him.

Of course, it could also be the fact that I'm starting to get a hang of this whole points system from Weight Watchers (for men). It could be the fact that I'm starting to figure out how to eat right...or it could be Sven and Mr. Not-so-nice-eyes.

What about you? Do you have some magical mystery guardians??

My own worst frenemy

To tell the truth, I'm my own worst critic. I'm too hard on myself. And when I start saying that, I start to reassure myself saying platitudes like "It's okay, you're doing your best" or "things are tough right, chillax and don't be too hard on yourself." And then I hit back, "Yeah, well, I was much thinner a year ago right now and even four months ago I was curling more and benching more than I am now." This conversation usually happens in my head at the wrong times. Like when I'm trying to sleep and I just want to yell out "Will you two just knock it off!" Of course, when that third voice pops up, I start to worry about my own sanity.

I've been beating myself up lately to tell the truth. And some of it is good and some of it isn't. Last week, I took an honest look at myself and saw how my faith walk was being affected by how I was coping with stress. But I also resolved to fight against it. It was becoming a stumbling block for me and that ain't good at all.

My resolve has picked up and I’ve been once again faithful to hitting the weights and doing cardio. I’ve been fighting the urge to snack and that is so hard. I’ve learned to ask myself “Am I really hungry or am I just wanting to fill that void that’s there right now because I’m stressed?” And that’s a hard question to ask mainly because I know the answer. It’s hard.

And so, this morning, I decided to once again take an honest assessment of myself. I hadn’t measured myself since March 25. I was frustrated with myself. My gut gained 2 inches as did the rest of me. My biceps were good but other than that, I wasn’t where I had been in January or February. So I stopped checking in on myself to see my progress. So, this morning, I bit the bullet and did a reality check. Where was I? I had been struggling and enjoying too much Easter candy. I was worried I’d bloated out more Marlon Brando. I was shocked. I was roughly where I had been in March. Either I had been maintaining or I’ve dropped back down to where I was.

I was beating myself up negatively. In my honest assessment of myself, I realized that there were things to change and so I began working on that. But I also saw that I had to stop being my own worst frenemy. It was hurting me. I’m rubber you’re glue just doesn’t work when you’re picking on yourself.

What about you? Where have you been beating yourself up and where do you need to do an honest assessment of yourself—physically, emotionally spiritually?

Fighting snacking like a Klingon

Since my last post, I've been working on at not snacking. Now many dietitians and health experts state that having some snacks in between meals is a good thing. Yes, it is when you eat healthy, low calorie food once at a small intervals. On the other hand, you shouldn't graze the cupboards and pantries of your house like a cow escaped from the stockyards.

My last post about gluttony brought some interesting responses on Facebook. There was a reaction that I was connecting being overweight with gluttony. Let me be very direct. I wasn't. There. I said it. But what I should have stated previously is that being overweight isn't the problem, it is a symptom. It is a symptom of a health issue, an emotional issue or a spiritual issue. If you are overweight, please see a doctor and work through this as I did. I've had numerous physicals and each time I've been told that I'm perfectly healthy save for that gigantic Santa sized spare tire around my gut. The culprit? I've narrowed it down to snacking.

On Tuesday, I did something interesting. I fasted. I didn't eat for a chunk of the day. I wanted to see what the problem was. I figured, eliminate the base and see where the craving develop. It was so stinking hard! I so just wanted to snack. I wasn't hungry. I didn't have that rumbly in my tumbly. I just wanted to snack.

And so, I've decided fight against snacking like a Klingon! Yes, that wonderful fictional alien race from Star Trek renowned for their love of battle and honor. I’ve never really fought off snacking before. Back two years ago when I really started dropping weight. I was still snacking. I loved me some beef jerky and peanut butter Twix. Yet, I was also at a different place in my life. My job and responsibilities had me more active. I was moving around more. I didn’t need to fight it off. But now I do.

So, I figured I’d take my example from the Klingons. They fight with honor (or at least supposed to) so should I. For a Klingon, Honor is more important than life. For me, to live is Christ, to die is gain. If I'm putting snacking ahead of Jesus, then I'm in trouble. So, if I’m going to fight off snacking, I need to stick to my guns. Not this, well, just this once. I’ve tried that. It backfired. And then I beat myself up. I know for myself that what works is a conscious decisions to move forward in the war against snacking. And so I must do so with honor.

Klingons are also known for their toughness. So, when fighting against snacking like a Klingon, I know I need to be tough. I need to endure. I need to push through it. When others are snacking, I need to hold back. I need to also watch how much I eat and of what. Eating a nice healthy sandwich like that BBQ Turkey Burger (460 calories) from Hardee's is much better than eating their Monster Burger. I mean, who can resist 2 patties of pure meat with each level glued together with bacon. With 1,320 calories I’m gonna need try. (Finding out the calories to one of my favorite sandwiches was like seeing Jar Jar for the first time in Phantom Menace.) I gotta be tough. I gotta be strong.

And so I think of these words

“I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:13

And so I pray to God that Christ gives me the strength of a Klingon, the honor and toughness of a Klingon to wage this war against snacking. I didn’t start it, but by golly, with the help of Christ at my side, I’m gonna end this bugger.

Now I just gotta figure out how to stay loyal to my exercise routine like a Wookie.