Magical mystery tour of gaurdians of the fridge

I think someone's been guarding my fridge or something. I mean, seriously, I just can't seem to get into it as of late. I mean, I open the fridge but then I don't see what I think I wanted to see or something like that and I shut the door. Then, I just walk away.

When I felt the urge to snack, I'd open the fridge. Not see anything I liked. Then checked the freezer. If I still didn't find anything I liked, I then checked the cupboards. If it turned up zilch back to the fridge and the frightening cycle begins.

Yet, it's almost as if I have some magical mystery guardians or something around the house or something. I'm just not getting past certain points. I just don't get it.

I can almost imagine some gigantic viking named Sven or something standing in my way like the angel did for Balaam. Or Gandalf standing in the way saying "You shall not pass!" Don't know what it is, but it's like I'm just not getting there or something.

And then, when I go to the store, it's like there's some gaurdian there as well, blocking me from buying these sweets or really really really good types of food. And if I do throw something in my cart, it's like woosh and it's out again. I can just imagine some mean looking guy with a sword and sash or something just walking around smacking the bad food from my cart and hand (He wasn't around yesterday when I bought the apple fritters. He and Sven went out for coffee or something I think, but hey, even magical mystery guardians need a coffee break here and there, I'm tough work for them, poor guys). I don't know if I have a name or not for the guy in the supermarket that's been stalking me lately but he doesn't look all too pretty.

Yeah, that's him.

Of course, it could also be the fact that I'm starting to get a hang of this whole points system from Weight Watchers (for men). It could be the fact that I'm starting to figure out how to eat right...or it could be Sven and Mr. Not-so-nice-eyes.

What about you? Do you have some magical mystery guardians??

Points to ponder

I gave up. I decided I needed help. A year ago, I was under my goal weight and was joyfully trying to figure out my new goal weight. I was under 300lbs for the first time in 10 years! Then we moved to South Dakota where the main recipe in a lot of the food here is a pinch of awesome. You want good farm cookin where the steak you're chowin down on just mooed three days ago, come to South Dakota.

Then it happened. Slowly at first. It crept up on me. First I noticed my collar was getting a bit to tight when I tied my tie. Then I noticed my pants were starting to hurt a little bit if I sat down too long (and that's at the natural waist line, none of this over/under stuff for me). I queitly one day snuck out and bought a cheap pair of jeans that were a size bigger. No one had to know. Not even me. Then I had to get a larger dress shirt and that's when it hurt.

And so, I began the ever spiral of self pitty and Pillsbury Chocolate icing. A number of stressful life factors came in as well. But still, I used the icing to smooth over the cracks of pain. I began hitting the gym more and harder. I was feeling more fit. I was feeling better. I was still hovering around 330 though. And I couldn't get it below 328.

Finally, as a birthday present, I was given a three month membership to Weight Watchers. That girly thing? Where Jennifer Hudson and others advertise how it's helped them. I'm all in but the only girlish figure I want is my wife standing next to me. No, no no, they have Weight Watchers for men. So, is this like where you can eat more meat and less veggies? Nope. But it does have a cool iPhone app.

On Sunday, we had cake. My first thought: How many points. Yeah. that's right. I didn't think of anything else. Not the fact that it was in celebration of 70 years of marriage for a couple in our church, not that, the points.

I'm also realizing I'm stingy too. I'm eating more fruits not because they're good for me. No. Because they're 0 points. ya. Nada, zippo. So, if I want to eat ice cream at night and it's 2 in the afternoon. I save my points by munching on an apple.

But at the same time it's like "but I like a ton of mayo on my burgers." Nope. 9 points for 3 tablespoons of that stuff.

So, I'm not eating exactly what i want but I know I can have some burgers and ice cream. Still figuring out these points. I also read a post this morning on Robshep.com about the same thing. So I'm not the only dude trying to figure all this out.

So, I'll ask the same questions he did: Have you ever done weight watchers? Have you lost weight? What'd you think of it?