I am...precious in His sight

What's your name?

No, not the one your parent's gave you, but the one your friends gave you. The one your enemies gave you. The one those cheerleaders who never actually let you into your group and teased the snot out of you gave you. Yeah. That name. The name you get called when you and your friends are hanging out--"Knothead" "Numbn...ts" "Fartknocker." What about the names your enemies have given you--"Skank" (that word that rhymes with "witch"), "Jerk" "Weirdo."

Those are the names that stick with us from childhood to junior high to high school. These are the names that hit us at the wrong moments when we hear a compliment or someone trying to be supportive. Even though they are being nice and kind, even though they are trying to be encouraging, you still, in the back of your mind hear those words.

Oh, those blasted frakin' awful words that hurt like sticks and stones. Names will hurt us. They hurt us worse than them sticks and stones which break our bones. And even when we're rubber and they're glue, the names still stick to us and not to you.

And then, when we look in the mirror first thing in the morning, we feel sorry for the mirror. Even our reflection's muttering things under their breathe. We see every blackhead, every zit, every gray hair, every bag under our eyes. We see the cylon underneath our skin and we don't like it at all (okay, that might be reserved for a Spiritual Sci-Fi Friday. Ask a fellow a geek for help on that one..it's from the rebooted BSG).

How many times have we said to the mirror in our bathrooms first thing in the morning "Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest of them all." And we hope, we dream, we pray that it's us and the mirror responds with a snap and a head twist "Sure ain't you honey."

That's our view of ourselves.

But then we're hear God's view of us

But now this is what the Lord says--"He who created you...He who formed you...Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine...for I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." Isaiah 43:1 & 3

He has a different name for you. He has a name beyond names--you are precious in his sight. You are beautiful to him. You are His.

Now, will you take his hand? Will you allow him to call you precious?

In the Colorado Wilderness (redux)

(This is a repost from my old The Harbor blog. This was written during a time of distress and frustration. We went on a family vacation only to have our minivan die on the side of the road in eastern Colorado [which, incidentally looks like Tattoinne.. saw a jawa at Starbucks there]. Now that we're going on our first vacation since this incident, I thought I'd repost it for fun...and hoping it never happens again. Please to enjoy)


When you pass through the waters, I will be with you and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior Isaiah 42:2-3


These words ring oh so much truer for me now. It’s been a hard couple of days. We were looking forward to some rest, relaxation, fun, and visiting family. And then it happened. Our car died. I mean, it’s beaten up beyond repair. It’s more dead than the career of that kid who played Screech on Saved by the Bell.

Now we’ve been stranded, stuck, in beautiful eastern Colorado. I can see the snow capped mountains in the background. I can see the fir trees turning slightly brown due to lack of water. It’s gorgeous…but not where we wanted to be.

I will admit it, I’m frustrated. This isn’t what I wanted our first family vacation to be like.
These words from the book of Isaiah are words given to the Children of Israel during times of trouble. “When you pass through waters, I will be with you” God tells them. Waters was a way of describing chaos..which I feel like we’re living in right now. And then he says “When you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep you over.” Rivers were natural borders between countries and a lot of these rivers were fierce and formable during the rainy season when they were at their peak. When trouble is surrounding us as we pass into a new time in our lives, God says he will be with us. And then he says “When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” Basically, to borrow from Battlestar Galatctica, when everthing’s fraked up beyond repair, God will not let us be consumed by it; it won’t take over our lives.

This is supposed to be good news for me, right? “Yes, yes it is” I keep telling myself. “God has a plan and this is part of it” I keep telling myself. And these answers are true and real. I know God is in control, but right now, it feels like everything’s fraked up and not going according to plan.
So this is what I’m doing right now. I’m trusting, I praying and I’m walking forward.

I’m trusting that God will provide. God says that he takes care of us. He will be there. In fact, not a hair can fall from my head without Him knowing or being somehow involved (I spotted a gray hair yesterday…from the trip, I don’t know…but if God’s involved somehow, we’re going to have words). Everything is out of my control. I am at the mercy of others. I can’t have a say right now, because other people will determine what will happen. So I need to trust that God will use these people to get us through this mess we’re in and that it will be a great story to tell later on how great God truly is.

I’m also praying. I’m praying so much that I’ve even set the timer on my cell phone to go off once an hour so I can pray. But part of prayer is also listening. So I’m asking God for help, pleading with him for help, but I’m also listening to his direction and guidance.

And I'm walking forward. This is the toughest part. But I know that God is there. He is speaking, he is active. I remember the verse right before the ones I quoted above where he says “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.” I am His. He has summoned me by name. He is mine. I am His. The God of all the universe knows my name and I am His.

I wish I could end on that note. God is here. He answers my prayers. But the answer isn’t always what I want it to be. Right now, it’s “wait.” It s wait.

And so I wait…..

(epilogue--we did finally leave eastern Colorado and made it safely back to Chicago, sans vacation in California. Two years later, we are once again attempting a trip back to California. I might have a blog post or two when I come back. In the mean time, there will be some good guest bloggers on here to keep the blog a goin')

what I've learned from coffee--A lenten meditation

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I love coffee. There's just something about it first thing in the morning that gets me going. And, no, it's not the caffeine. Okay, it's not just the caffeine. It's all the memories wrapped up into it. There's something about sitting around with friends drinking coffee and eating a slice of pie. There's something about standing around after church, coffee in hand, gabbing away with friends.

Recently, I've realized just how thankful I am for coffee.

We've all gone through hard ache and pain. We've all heard the cry of the catawampus. But what happens at the end of the tunnel? What's the outcome?

For me, it all boils down to coffee. Literally.

Take three items here--carrots, eggs and coffee beans. Carrots are hard, stiff. Eggs are fragile, coffee beans are hard and oily.

When problems hit, they can hit us hard and totally mess with us in ways we'd never like. It's a lot like boiling water. Hot, scalding, violent.

Carrots in boiling water become soft, floppy, and loose a lot of nutrients. So many times, we can run the risk of entering into a season of problems just like that and be beaten up so much we come out just floppy.

Eggs on the other hand get cooked. They look the same on the outside but on the inside they are hard...and that cooked yolk can be bitter. We can run the risk of looking the same on the outside, but be bitter and hard on the inside.

Coffee beans on the other hand are a different story. You put coffee beans in boiling water and you get coffee. Coffee beans change, they are still in boiling water, but the water now becomes coffee. Both change. And, in my open, are better for it.

Now, if life just down right stinks right now, don't become a carrot, don't become an egg. Allow it to stink but don't allow it to change you. Allow it to make you into something wonderful--let it turn you into coffee.

In fact, God promises to make you coffee

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God. Isaiah 43:2-3

Paul says something in Romans that helps me to remember that I will always be coffee because of the grace of God.

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39

Looking at Easter, it's because of Jesus that we can truly be coffee by the grace of God.

Are you coffee?